


I am a Tramp!?

by MercurialComet



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: And A golden girls scene, Crack, Gen, I Can't Believe I Wrote This, Implied/Referenced Cheating, Past Relationship(s), based on a youtube video, no beta we die like Glenn, wrote this in ten mintues ngl
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-04
Updated: 2019-12-04
Packaged: 2021-02-26 04:28:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 616
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21667447
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MercurialComet/pseuds/MercurialComet
Summary: Felix and Sylvain got into it everybody.
Relationships: Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd/Felix Hugo Fraldarius, Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd/Sylvain Jose Gautier, Sylvain Jose Gautier & Felix Hugo Fraldarius
Comments: 2
Kudos: 10





	I am a Tramp!?

**Author's Note:**

> This Is A Joke.
> 
> Have Fun.
> 
> [Here's the link btw](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_Qw2Kf0tq-I&t=4s)

The door of the classroom finally closed, Dimitri and Dedue having swiftly exited in all the chaos. Felix hesitated before he looked at Sylvain. “I can’t believe that just happened.”

Sylvain’s eyebrow arched as he glared at Felix. “I think you owe me an explanation.”

“Well,” Felix started, “Dimitri and I-”

“I don’t have to stand here and listen to this.” Sylvain quickly whipped around, moving past the rest of the house as he made his way to the back of the room. Felix quickly followed, only stopping to match Ingrid’s glare toe to toe.

“Ingrid, don’t give me that look.”

“What look?” Ingrid asked, knowing exactly the look she was giving the swordsman.

“Look, I didn’t do anything wrong.” Felix stated, irritated that everyone was overreacting. “The boar and I just talked last night.”

“Right, and Loog was a robber who took people out by arrowpoint.”

Felix ignored the comment and made his way over to Sylvain, who was currently sitting down in the corner of the room with Ashe. “Sylvain. Sylvain, if I knew there was something between you and the boar, I never would have done what I did.”

Ashe looked confused. “What did you do, Felix?”

Sylvain scoffed. “He spent the night with Dimitri.”

“But Dimitri is dating you Sylvain!” Ashe said as he turned to face Felix. “Felix, you must have slept with someone else.”

Felix only glared at the archer for a few seconds before he faced Sylvain again. “Sylvain, I didn’t steal your date. The boar told me that the two of you were just talking-”

“Oh, we were obviously just talking.” Sylvain spat. “He’s upright, boring, and has dubious taste in men.”

Felix’s eyes narrowed. “If that is some schoolyard attempt to ground my wyvern, you’re wasting your breath.”

Sylvain smirked. “I’m simply wondering how anyone could possibly choose you over me.”

Felix didn’t let his eyes wander. “That’s not working Sylvain.”

“I suppose there could be some exceptions,” Sylvain reasoned. “Maybe people returning from exile when they haven’t seen a man in 25 years.”

Felix saw pink. “It’s still not working, you bimbo.”

“How childish.” Sylvain said smugly. “To resort to name calling, you dastard.”

“Floozy.” Felix spat, looking back at the rest of the class staring at this interaction.

“Tramp.”

The swordsman’s head immediately whipped back to focus on Sylvain after he spoke, his vision becoming more and more red. “I am a tramp?!” He barked. “Sylvain, have you heard the latest word from the Kingdom?”

A person could faintly hear Annette mutter, “Oh no” before Felix went on his tirade.

“Join the Army, see all of Fodlan, sleep with Sylvain Gautier?” Sylvain’s eyes widened, but Felix wasn’t done yet.

“Join the Mages, learn the arcane arts, and sleep with Sylvain Gautier?” Dorothea was choking on her silent laughter in the background, Mercedes focusing on helping her as her gut started to hurt. Felix’s tongue lashed out for one last attack.

“The Pegasi riders are looking for a few good people who have not slept with Sylvain Gautier!”

The room was silent after Felix’s outburst, the two men refocused on their verbal dual. Sylvain looked slightly rattled, but he composed himself. “What are you trying to imply, Fraldarius?”

Felix looked nearly feral as he snarled.  _ “Slut.” _

_ “Trash!” _

A loud bang interrupted the two before they tore into each other, a heavy tome at Ashe’s feet. The archer sighed before he spoke. “Hey, why don’t we calm down before we say something we’ll all regret?”

  
Both Felix and Sylvain’s eyes narrowed, the fury in them focusing down into points sharper than Hilda’s axe. They seemed to have the same thought as they both shouted,  _ “Shut up Ashe!” _


End file.
